Comments on: Why divorced men remarry more often than divorced women: a preliminary reflection http://hugoschwyzer.net/2007/01/16/why-divorced-men-remarry-more-often-than-divorced-women-a-preliminary-reflection/ Fri, 12 Mar 2010 02:17:23 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.3.3 By: matey http://hugoschwyzer.net/2007/01/16/why-divorced-men-remarry-more-often-than-divorced-women-a-preliminary-reflection/#comment-435309 matey Mon, 04 Aug 2008 14:17:30 +0000 http://hugoschwyzer.net/2007/01/16/why-divorced-men-remarry-more-often-than-divorced-women-a-preliminary-reflection/#comment-435309 I'm in my late 30s and never been married (I'm a woman) I'd like to be though, I'd like the companionship and closeness. I'd like the feeling of growing up together and creating a shared history, which I think might be a less ellaborate expression of what Hugo likes about is marraige. I've just not met anyone to do that with, at the right time. I see housework as work and am not about to do somebody elses share. I'd be very offended if a man expected me to mother him in that way, would see him as someone who had little regard for me and would probably reject him (I want companionship not slavery). I accept that I may never meet someone who is right for me, but remaining single is incomparably better than the misery of being unhappily married. As for the idea that I should put up with misery for the sake of society and children, well I am society, and so will our children be when they grow up. I’m in my late 30s and never been married (I’m a woman) I’d like to be though, I’d like the companionship and closeness. I’d like the feeling of growing up together and creating a shared history, which I think might be a less ellaborate expression of what Hugo likes about is marraige. I’ve just not met anyone to do that with, at the right time. I see housework as work and am not about to do somebody elses share. I’d be very offended if a man expected me to mother him in that way, would see him as someone who had little regard for me and would probably reject him (I want companionship not slavery). I accept that I may never meet someone who is right for me, but remaining single is incomparably better than the misery of being unhappily married. As for the idea that I should put up with misery for the sake of society and children, well I am society, and so will our children be when they grow up.

]]> By: EKM http://hugoschwyzer.net/2007/01/16/why-divorced-men-remarry-more-often-than-divorced-women-a-preliminary-reflection/#comment-435009 EKM Mon, 04 Aug 2008 05:21:03 +0000 http://hugoschwyzer.net/2007/01/16/why-divorced-men-remarry-more-often-than-divorced-women-a-preliminary-reflection/#comment-435009 On the subject of who is happiest and at what age I think it all depends on the individual. I am a 55 year old lady who was married for 20 years and has been divorced for 3. Currently I am supporting my three kids in college, finishing my own degree and have come to the realization that I will be working until I am too old to navigate by way of a walker. We owned a family business and social security all went under his name so all of that is quite limited. My ex lived in strip bars and through cyber porn for the last five years of our marriage and it was he that decided a divorce was better than family counseling. I swore if my marriage ever failed I would not look for someone else until my kids were grown...to much hardship on everyone. I believe for me that was the correct decision. I see to many divorced women with children spending more time looking for the next mister right than taking care of the precious cargo at home. My ex has managed to plead lack of funds many times leaving his children to go without the necessities. He has ignored his bills until they found their way to me and I was left holding the bag. However, he is not the total dead beat that many divorced fathers become. As for his stuff...it is all still in his house, on his farm, with his car and truck parked outside. He spends his time as he pleases with his girlfriend that is 20 years younger. Excuse me if I sound a tad nasty, but his 24 year old "virgin mary" was part of the picture long before we separated and he filed for divorce. Over all, I cannot say that the divorce has made me bitter. I have come to grips with his decision to "move on". I do find that his decision to reclaim his freedom has placed a fracture in our family concerning family get togethers such as birthdays and holidays. As for the future, I lost everything trying to keep my kids heads covered, food in their stomachs and shoes on their feet. If I allow myself, I can become "scared" about what lies ahead and that could easily turn to bitterness. My goodwill furniture and lack of retirement funds are a far cry from where I thought I would be at this point in my life. Still...I have the power to decide how all of this will affect me. Somedays are harder than others, but I refuse to let the past determine the future. I am open to finding someone down the road that is interested in sharing themselves. Until that happens I enbrace the good days and keep my head up during those that are not so great. On the subject of who is happiest and at what age I think it all depends on the individual. I am a 55 year old lady who was married for 20 years and has been divorced for 3. Currently I am supporting my three kids in college, finishing my own degree and have come to the realization that I will be working until I am too old to navigate by way of a walker. We owned a family business and social security all went under his name so all of that is quite limited.
My ex lived in strip bars and through cyber porn for the last five years of our marriage and it was he that decided a divorce was better than family counseling. I swore if my marriage ever failed I would not look for someone else until my kids were grown…to much hardship on everyone. I believe for me that was the correct decision. I see to many divorced women with children spending more time looking for the next mister right than taking care of the precious cargo at home.
My ex has managed to plead lack of funds many times leaving his children to go without the necessities. He has ignored his bills until they found their way to me and I was left holding the bag. However, he is not the total dead beat that many divorced fathers become. As for his stuff…it is all still in his house, on his farm, with his car and truck parked outside. He spends his time as he pleases with his girlfriend that is 20 years younger. Excuse me if I sound a tad nasty, but his 24 year old “virgin mary” was part of the picture long before we separated and he filed for divorce.

Over all, I cannot say that the divorce has made me bitter. I have come to grips with his decision to “move on”. I do find that his decision to reclaim his freedom has placed a fracture in our family concerning family get togethers such as birthdays and holidays.

As for the future, I lost everything trying to keep my kids heads covered, food in their stomachs and shoes on their feet. If I allow myself, I can become “scared” about what lies ahead and that could easily turn to bitterness. My goodwill furniture and lack of retirement funds are a far cry from where I thought I would be at this point in my life.

Still…I have the power to decide how all of this will affect me. Somedays are harder than others, but I refuse to let the past determine the future. I am open to finding someone down the road that is interested in sharing themselves. Until that happens I enbrace the good days and keep my head up during those that are not so great.

]]> By: L.B. http://hugoschwyzer.net/2007/01/16/why-divorced-men-remarry-more-often-than-divorced-women-a-preliminary-reflection/#comment-411007 L.B. Mon, 07 Jul 2008 19:21:40 +0000 http://hugoschwyzer.net/2007/01/16/why-divorced-men-remarry-more-often-than-divorced-women-a-preliminary-reflection/#comment-411007 Hah! Just stumbled across this commentary this morning. I could'nt agree more! Single woman here, age 48, divorced ( my choice ) for 5.5 years now and there is NO way in hell that I would ever re-marry. As the poster above mentioned this decision has nothing to do with bitterness or any sort of gender angst, I am just waaay to happy being footloose and fancy free. Have a great little country home, pets, good friends and an active spiritual life. Have a gardener and just bought myself a new blower. I can gove myself my own blowjobs now! LOL Got a top of the line shower massage and turbo jets in the hot tub...what more could I want? Hah! Just stumbled across this commentary this morning.

I could’nt agree more!

Single woman here, age 48, divorced ( my choice ) for 5.5 years now and there is NO way in hell that I would ever re-marry.

As the poster above mentioned this decision has nothing to do with bitterness or any sort of gender angst, I am just waaay to happy being footloose and fancy free.

Have a great little country home, pets, good friends and an active spiritual life. Have a gardener and just bought myself a new blower. I can gove myself my own blowjobs now! LOL

Got a top of the line shower massage and turbo jets in the hot tub…what more could I want?

]]> By: angel http://hugoschwyzer.net/2007/01/16/why-divorced-men-remarry-more-often-than-divorced-women-a-preliminary-reflection/#comment-385847 angel Tue, 17 Jun 2008 17:01:45 +0000 http://hugoschwyzer.net/2007/01/16/why-divorced-men-remarry-more-often-than-divorced-women-a-preliminary-reflection/#comment-385847 It is sad to read many of the responses here. The author is right, after being married, having kids, etc., divorce was liberating. It doesn't have anything to do with my age, my marketability, my bitterness, it has everything to do with empowerment. Since my divorce I have recieved a BS and a Masters Degree, have not had to deal with anyone telling me when, what, or where...I do what I want, when I want, with whom I want. My kids are thriving, my dating life is whatever I want it to be...matter of a fact just got back from out of state with a male lawyer friend, free trip for me, and my friends, well they are either single, divorced, or trying like hell to get away from their spouses....being single at 37 is liberating and fun. I don't want a man, it would be like raising another needy child. Pooey on all you conservatives... It is sad to read many of the responses here. The author is right, after being married, having kids, etc., divorce was liberating. It doesn’t have anything to do with my age, my marketability, my bitterness, it has everything to do with empowerment. Since my divorce I have recieved a BS and a Masters Degree, have not had to deal with anyone telling me when, what, or where…I do what I want, when I want, with whom I want. My kids are thriving, my dating life is whatever I want it to be…matter of a fact just got back from out of state with a male lawyer friend, free trip for me, and my friends, well they are either single, divorced, or trying like hell to get away from their spouses….being single at 37 is liberating and fun. I don’t want a man, it would be like raising another needy child. Pooey on all you conservatives…

]]> By: R.K. http://hugoschwyzer.net/2007/01/16/why-divorced-men-remarry-more-often-than-divorced-women-a-preliminary-reflection/#comment-339193 R.K. Sun, 11 May 2008 18:27:16 +0000 http://hugoschwyzer.net/2007/01/16/why-divorced-men-remarry-more-often-than-divorced-women-a-preliminary-reflection/#comment-339193 Men bring wonderful things to a relationship.. things that women want and need. Women bring wonderful things to a relationship... things men want and need. Children of these relationships need parents who cooperate and sacrifice for the greater good of the family... Not always, but often, women are placed at a disadvantage when they are the primary care-giver to the husband and child, supporting the husbands role as bread-winner. (A mom may work, but will usually be the one to receive less education, a lower status job, and be a worse employee as she is absent to care for her children.) As the years go by and the man and/or woman tires of the constraints of the marriage, there is a divorce. The woman and child tend to head into poverty and the man is free (except for his lost "stuff" and child support check that is less than his car, boat, or motorcycle, payment) he is free to entertain other women and start a new life. The woman and child are struggling with all the issues of raising teenagers, trying to get cars for them, trying to keep them out of trouble and in school and their isn't much entertaining going on at the house for the mom trying to hold it all together. Of course women get bitter. It is a lonely road and none of our experience is valued... it is all just "baggage". Congratulations to the men who stay and pay and work hard to make it right. Where do I find one? Note: I married at 18, a man of 26, who promised I would get to attend school and pursue career goals... instead I got jobs, maid, house=painter, convenience store clerk, secretary... and kids x 2. After 16 years and his career advancement he decided to start sleeping with his secretaries. I left... put myself through night school, took care of the kids that he never visits. Put myself through Grad school (so I could actually make a living for the kids and myself.) All the while, he bought fancy homes, dated a dozen women, acquired, boats, cars, a company, motorcycles, three wheelers, guns, etc... All over an eight year period. He got married on Fathers Day, didn't invite the kids. Went skiing for christmas, Hunting on Thanksgiving. He has sued me 3 times in the past four years to reduce his child support (from 500 a months to $150.00 a month) , to gain custody, etc... he's always lost, but I always have to pay an attorney to defend the action. (Since he doesn't even bother to visit his children.) It is all so tiresome. So, now I'm a professional digging out of 150K of financial aid debt.. we live in our 1000 square foot house with termites and broken plumbing. He dropped a 5 speed truck with a broken gas guage and 150K miles on it off over here for our precious 16 year old daughter to drive.... she doesn't weigh enough to press in the clutch. He drives a new Lexus and a newer super cab leather loaded pickup. He also bought her a puppy for Christmas one year. It lives with me and I support her too. But we have each other, and we don't miss him, and we will get far enough ahead to get her a decent, safe care, and eventually we can afford to get the damn dog spayed, but we do wish he would go away and he needn't do us any more favors. 43 year old white female with the face and body of an attractive 30 year old, grad degree, income in excess of 80K per year, divorced 8 years, kids almost grown, seeks a man who is just not a heartless ass to catch dinner and a movie with every once in a while. Men bring wonderful things to a relationship.. things that women want and need. Women bring wonderful things to a relationship… things men want and need. Children of these relationships need parents who cooperate and sacrifice for the greater good of the family… Not always, but often, women are placed at a disadvantage when they are the primary care-giver to the husband and child, supporting the husbands role as bread-winner. (A mom may work, but will usually be the one to receive less education, a lower status job, and be a worse employee as she is absent to care for her children.) As the years go by and the man and/or woman tires of the constraints of the marriage, there is a divorce. The woman and child tend to head into poverty and the man is free (except for his lost “stuff” and child support check that is less than his car, boat, or motorcycle, payment) he is free to entertain other women and start a new life. The woman and child are struggling with all the issues of raising teenagers, trying to get cars for them, trying to keep them out of trouble and in school and their isn’t much entertaining going on at the house for the mom trying to hold it all together. Of course women get bitter. It is a lonely road and none of our experience is valued… it is all just “baggage”. Congratulations to the men who stay and pay and work hard to make it right. Where do I find one?

Note: I married at 18, a man of 26, who promised I would get to attend school and pursue career goals… instead I got jobs, maid, house=painter, convenience store clerk, secretary… and kids x 2. After 16 years and his career advancement he decided to start sleeping with his secretaries. I left… put myself through night school, took care of the kids that he never visits. Put myself through Grad school (so I could actually make a living for the kids and myself.) All the while, he bought fancy homes, dated a dozen women, acquired, boats, cars, a company, motorcycles, three wheelers, guns, etc… All over an eight year period. He got married on Fathers Day, didn’t invite the kids. Went skiing for christmas, Hunting on Thanksgiving. He has sued me 3 times in the past four years to reduce his child support (from 500 a months to $150.00 a month) , to gain custody, etc… he’s always lost, but I always have to pay an attorney to defend the action. (Since he doesn’t even bother to visit his children.) It is all so tiresome.

So, now I’m a professional digging out of 150K of financial aid debt.. we live in our 1000 square foot house with termites and broken plumbing. He dropped a 5 speed truck with a broken gas guage and 150K miles on it off over here for our precious 16 year old daughter to drive…. she doesn’t weigh enough to press in the clutch. He drives a new Lexus and a newer super cab leather loaded pickup. He also bought her a puppy for Christmas one year. It lives with me and I support her too.

But we have each other, and we don’t miss him, and we will get far enough ahead to get her a decent, safe care, and eventually we can afford to get the damn dog spayed, but we do wish he would go away and he needn’t do us any more favors.

43 year old white female with the face and body of an attractive 30 year old, grad degree, income in excess of 80K per year, divorced 8 years, kids almost grown, seeks a man who is just not a heartless ass to catch dinner and a movie with every once in a while.

]]> By: Mark http://hugoschwyzer.net/2007/01/16/why-divorced-men-remarry-more-often-than-divorced-women-a-preliminary-reflection/#comment-298701 Mark Wed, 09 Apr 2008 10:41:37 +0000 http://hugoschwyzer.net/2007/01/16/why-divorced-men-remarry-more-often-than-divorced-women-a-preliminary-reflection/#comment-298701 Regardless of what anyone says, life was much more stable, organized, straight-flowing, relaxed, pleasant, family oriented and less stressful in the days when the man was the sole bread-winner and the wife stayed at home and took care of the house and raised the kids. As well, there is strong evidence that this type of life raised much smarter kids, who had far less mental problems than kids of today. Of course, this type of life was not the best way for each person and many were un-happy that way. There were more extra-marital affairs than we care to believe and abusive marriages, but they were not talked about and life continued on its straight and stable path. Overall, society (including economic and social realms) was far better off. What do you want out of life, a better society overall for our children, or your own personal happiness? I am divorced three times, but I am still not dumb enough to ignore past history or what worked well in the past. Regardless of what anyone says, life was much more stable, organized, straight-flowing, relaxed, pleasant, family oriented and less stressful in the days when the man was the sole bread-winner and the wife stayed at home and took care of the house and raised the kids. As well, there is strong evidence that this type of life raised much smarter kids, who had far less mental problems than kids of today. Of course, this type of life was not the best way for each person and many were un-happy that way. There were more extra-marital affairs than we care to believe and abusive marriages, but they were not talked about and life continued on its straight and stable path. Overall, society (including economic and social realms) was far better off. What do you want out of life, a better society overall for our children, or your own personal happiness? I am divorced three times, but I am still not dumb enough to ignore past history or what worked well in the past.

]]> By: Erika Kreis (Erika) http://hugoschwyzer.net/2007/01/16/why-divorced-men-remarry-more-often-than-divorced-women-a-preliminary-reflection/#comment-277017 Erika Kreis (Erika) Fri, 21 Mar 2008 16:34:05 +0000 http://hugoschwyzer.net/2007/01/16/why-divorced-men-remarry-more-often-than-divorced-women-a-preliminary-reflection/#comment-277017 As an unmarried woman I was expected to have a career/job - to "take care of myself." The days of parents marrying you off or looking after you if you didn't marry, are long gone on this continent. As a married woman I was expected to continue with the career/job,to contribute to "taking care of my family," have children (do most of the duties like getting up in the night when they are sick, taking them to lessons) and do most of the housework (note I didn't say all but I did say most). I think my career took off more than my husband's (in his point of view, not mine) and that contributed to our divorce. I had opinions which, at work, were considered but, at home, were seen as being "unsupportive." Guys, don't expect women to take on the male's "traditional" role as a breadwinner and expect her to keep the female's "traditional" role as the dutiful wife...unless, of course, she wants that. I didn't. Since my divorce (yes, I filed...what was I to do? If my "husband" is dating someone else, he's not my husband, right? So, I filed.), life isn't much different than being married, except, of course, no husband (a big difference there). I do more (not significantly more) but I do it when I want to under my terms. I'm back to taking care of myself and I like it. I'm not taking care of others (my children are grown and I hang around with the grandchildren several days a week) and I like that too. Women in the USA and Canada have a voice, they vote, they have equal rights. We don't wrap up our faces and bodies in subservience, serve you unquestioningly and show immense gratitude for you letting us live. We just aren't there anymore. And, for Anonymous, even his catalogue bride would want to be where we are now. He's delusional. The day we brought home the bacon, cooked it and cleaned up after it was the day we no longer "needed" men in the old traditional way. That meant the marriage contract had to change. So, I do not intend to remarry unless I meet someone I want to spend a lot of time with and who respects me as I respect him - that's the basis of the new contract. The marriage to a "good providers" in exchange for "youth and beauty" will go the way of the do-do bird. As an unmarried woman I was expected to have a career/job - to “take care of myself.” The days of parents marrying you off or looking after you if you didn’t marry, are long gone on this continent. As a married woman I was expected to continue with the career/job,to contribute to “taking care of my family,” have children (do most of the duties like getting up in the night when they are sick, taking them to lessons) and do most of the housework (note I didn’t say all but I did say most). I think my career took off more than my husband’s (in his point of view, not mine) and that contributed to our divorce. I had opinions which, at work, were considered but, at home, were seen as being “unsupportive.” Guys, don’t expect women to take on the male’s “traditional” role as a breadwinner and expect her to keep the female’s “traditional” role as the dutiful wife…unless, of course, she wants that. I didn’t.

Since my divorce (yes, I filed…what was I to do? If my “husband” is dating someone else, he’s not my husband, right? So, I filed.), life isn’t much different than being married, except, of course, no husband (a big difference there). I do more (not significantly more) but I do it when I want to under my terms. I’m back to taking care of myself and I like it. I’m not taking care of others (my children are grown and I hang around with the grandchildren several days a week) and I like that too.

Women in the USA and Canada have a voice, they vote, they have equal rights. We don’t wrap up our faces and bodies in subservience, serve you unquestioningly and show immense gratitude for you letting us live. We just aren’t there anymore. And, for Anonymous, even his catalogue bride would want to be where we are now. He’s delusional.

The day we brought home the bacon, cooked it and cleaned up after it was the day we no longer “needed” men in the old traditional way. That meant the marriage contract had to change. So, I do not intend to remarry unless I meet someone I want to spend a lot of time with and who respects me as I respect him - that’s the basis of the new contract. The marriage to a “good providers” in exchange for “youth and beauty” will go the way of the do-do bird.

]]> By: Lena http://hugoschwyzer.net/2007/01/16/why-divorced-men-remarry-more-often-than-divorced-women-a-preliminary-reflection/#comment-214270 Lena Wed, 30 Jan 2008 06:57:55 +0000 http://hugoschwyzer.net/2007/01/16/why-divorced-men-remarry-more-often-than-divorced-women-a-preliminary-reflection/#comment-214270 ok......guys!!!! I'm a 28 year old divorced lady with children that lives with ex-hubbie..... I'm not sure about divorced men remarrying sooner than divorced women but I'll tell you why I'm not so crazy about getting remarried....... First of all....I'm ssSSoooOOOOOOOooooohappy that I'm free!!!!! no more of that being controlled and manipulated......and like Mr. Bad said on previous posts.....women do become "bitter" just because they've been hurt so much in the past marriage and they don't feel like going through the same old S***!!!! THat's our women's protection guard going up...... See.....I think it all depends on how the marriage ended as well....... Men or women who were not happy or hurt in previous marriage tend to take longer to get remarried.......(my opinion) and fact for me....... I tried to meet new people and nice people.......guys who were actually willing to try to understand me.....but the reason why I choose to be single?......... My reasons why I want to be single: I can do whatever I want =) SO MUCH FREEDOM!!!! Cannot find the right person with qualities that I'm looking for in a guy Scared that I'm going to be stuck in another bad marriage Afraid I'm going to end up with another psychotic in-laws Most important......I don't think I'm ready I know I'm not ready because I tend to become really bitter with guys that I meet....well...not quite bitter, but more than my usual self..(I catch myself doing that sometimes and I hate it!!) And I don't think it's fair for the other person to go through S*** because of what I went through....... Well...that's all folks..... Hope you enjoyed my LoooOOOOng post =) ok……guys!!!! I’m a 28 year old divorced lady with children that lives with ex-hubbie…..

I’m not sure about divorced men remarrying sooner than divorced women but I’ll tell you why I’m not so crazy about getting remarried…….

First of all….I’m ssSSoooOOOOOOOooooohappy that I’m free!!!!! no more of that being controlled and manipulated……and like Mr. Bad said on previous posts…..women do become “bitter” just because they’ve been hurt so much in the past marriage and they don’t feel like going through the same old S***!!!! THat’s our women’s protection guard going up……

See…..I think it all depends on how the marriage ended as well…….

Men or women who were not happy or hurt in previous marriage tend to take longer to get remarried…….(my opinion) and fact for me…….

I tried to meet new people and nice people…….guys who were actually willing to try to understand me…..but the reason why I choose to be single?………

My reasons why I want to be single:

I can do whatever I want =) SO MUCH FREEDOM!!!!
Cannot find the right person with qualities that I’m looking for in a guy
Scared that I’m going to be stuck in another bad marriage
Afraid I’m going to end up with another psychotic in-laws
Most important……I don’t think I’m ready

I know I’m not ready because I tend to become really bitter with guys that I meet….well…not quite bitter, but more than my usual self..(I catch myself doing that sometimes and I hate it!!) And I don’t think it’s fair for the other person to go through S*** because of what I went through…….

Well…that’s all folks…..
Hope you enjoyed my LoooOOOOng post =)

]]> By: Disco Daddy http://hugoschwyzer.net/2007/01/16/why-divorced-men-remarry-more-often-than-divorced-women-a-preliminary-reflection/#comment-89539 Disco Daddy Tue, 31 Jul 2007 13:51:06 +0000 http://hugoschwyzer.net/2007/01/16/why-divorced-men-remarry-more-often-than-divorced-women-a-preliminary-reflection/#comment-89539 One interesting statistic that you left out is that the majority of men who marry a second time favour a woman who is younger then their first wife. These men who marry a second time have to be marrying SOMEBODY and if it is not older women then logic dictates that they are dating eager & willing nubile younger women. Now we all know that men are not equally desirable (this is true of women too!). There is normally a small percentage of eligible partners in any dating pool. So these older women are left with an even smaller pool of men to date in the first place. In economics 101 you learn that if the availability of a commodity shrinks then its value increases (law of supply and demand). And so you expect us to believe that women place a lower value on the very thing that is in short supply .ie older men.? Am I missing something here? Lest you think I am biased I must declare my interest. I have a passion for older women! I think they are intelligent, gorgeous, sexy with a lot of life experience. I find them extremely easy to date for the simple reason that the competition (older men) are busy dating women my age. My experiences have shown me that they are very sexually available. The romantic ones seek marriage but are insecure about their looks, the bitter or the contented ones are happy to just date or withdraw from the dating circuit altogether. I will close by saying that the tragedy is that some marriages don’t work out in the first place. One interesting statistic that you left out is that the majority of men who marry a second time favour a woman who is younger then their first wife.

These men who marry a second time have to be marrying SOMEBODY and if it is not older women then logic dictates that they are dating eager & willing nubile younger women.

Now we all know that men are not equally desirable (this is true of women too!). There is normally a small percentage of eligible partners in any dating pool. So these older women are left with an even smaller pool of men to date in the first place.

In economics 101 you learn that if the availability of a commodity shrinks then its value increases (law of supply and demand). And so you expect us to believe that women place a lower value on the very thing that is in short supply .ie older men.? Am I missing something here?

Lest you think I am biased I must declare my interest. I have a passion for older women! I think they are intelligent, gorgeous, sexy with a lot of life experience. I find them extremely easy to date for the simple reason that the competition (older men) are busy dating women my age. My experiences have shown me that they are very sexually available. The romantic ones seek marriage but are insecure about their looks, the bitter or the contented ones are happy to just date or withdraw from the dating circuit altogether.

I will close by saying that the tragedy is that some marriages don’t work out in the first place.

]]> By: Andrew_From_Thailand http://hugoschwyzer.net/2007/01/16/why-divorced-men-remarry-more-often-than-divorced-women-a-preliminary-reflection/#comment-29796 Andrew_From_Thailand Sun, 21 Jan 2007 14:41:23 +0000 http://hugoschwyzer.net/2007/01/16/why-divorced-men-remarry-more-often-than-divorced-women-a-preliminary-reflection/#comment-29796 <i>Quite right. The world is a more colorful, sunnier place for having cultures where the mere accusation of sexual impropriety is enough for a woman to be murdered by her own family to maintain its honor, without any legal penalties. Imagine how dull life would be if frowny feminists eliminated this diversity!</i> Ahh, so you <b>are</b> indeed saying a culture cannot offer choices to its citizens without feminism. It didn't take much for you to come out and say this. I posited an assumption, and you confirmed it. Well, in Thailand the accusation of sexual impropriety doesn't lead a women to be murdered by her own family, and I can also state that by all accounts Thailand is not a feminist country. Bit of an inconvenient truth to squeeze into your black and white world there - where feminist countries exist alongside non-feminist countries (those countries whereby women are murdered by their families for their sexual behaviour). Quite right. The world is a more colorful, sunnier place for having cultures where the mere accusation of sexual impropriety is enough for a woman to be murdered by her own family to maintain its honor, without any legal penalties. Imagine how dull life would be if frowny feminists eliminated this diversity!

Ahh, so you are indeed saying a culture cannot offer choices to its citizens without feminism. It didn’t take much for you to come out and say this. I posited an assumption, and you confirmed it.

Well, in Thailand the accusation of sexual impropriety doesn’t lead a women to be murdered by her own family, and I can also state that by all accounts Thailand is not a feminist country. Bit of an inconvenient truth to squeeze into your black and white world there - where feminist countries exist alongside non-feminist countries (those countries whereby women are murdered by their families for their sexual behaviour).

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