It’s been a while since I’ve posted some of the search terms that have led folks to this site. Here are a few, taken verbatim, with parenthetical comments from moi:
why are women such bitches nowdays? (Buddy, you’re reason #1)
how to overcom obstacles in a diverse church (A. learn to spell. B. stop seeing diversity as an obstacle)
should christian men go to water parks (As long as they don’t mind Christian children peeing in the water)
promiscuous or promiscuity or slut or slutty why buy the cow (Vegans don’t have this problem. But bonus points for spelling promiscuous right.)
tuffskins jeans (I got four separate searches for this. Tuffskin jeans in “husky” size were the agony of my childhood.)
male chastity his frustration women correct him (I smell an MRA)
when is touch inappropriate between male pastors and church women (Lots of searches on this topic, phrased in different ways)
what school does hugo schwyzer teach (Scary stalker people! I teach at, uh, Wichita State! No, wait, College of the Siskiyous!)
if my maternal great grandmother was white what percent white do i have (Whiteness is all about attitude. The real question is, how do you feel about Velveeta?)
gender studies land a cat on a hot tin roof (WTF?)
sleeping arrangement hotel boyfriend his kids (Let me recommend more than one room, whatever you decide)
steps to circumcise your own penis yourself (First step: get off the internet and call 911 and get thyself to a locked treatment facility. There’s a good boy.)
chinchillas having sex (Chinchillas don’t wish to have this discussed or photographed. We know it happens, but we don’t talk about it).
recommending sex after circumcision how long to wait (If you’re asking, it’s too soon.)
hugo in korean (Tell me, I want to know!)
And of course, endless numbers of queries for “older men, younger women” and “professor crushes.”
I can at least respond to the last query - but only if your computer can display hangeul…
Hugo Schwyzer: 휴고 쉬쩌선생님. Or should that be 아저씨? Hee hee.
Schweet! Thanks Ed!
Do you read hangeul, Hugo?
Haw! College of the Siskiyous. You have to love a college that isn’t afraid of being in a town called Weed.
(That’s my old stomping grounds way up there in Northern California. Conservative as heck, but beautiful country. Berkeley was quite the culture shock afterwards.)
BTW, I’m amused with your answers to the questions.
-kat
No, Ed, don’t read hangeul.
Katster, I’ve driven through Weed, once. Wish I had stayed longer.
It’s actually really easy to read - if you ever decide to take it up and practice your reading skills in LA K-Town, it’ll probably take you a week tops. (The Korean language, on the other hand, is another matter altogether.) But I’ll give you the Romanized version:
휴고 = hyu-go;
쉬쩌선생님 = shwi-tcheo-seon-saeng-nim (seonsaengnim ‘teacher’).
아저씨 = a-jeo-sshi ‘mister, sir’.
NB: “eo” is like ‘u’ in ‘fun’.
HAHAHAHAH! I needed that.
I LOVE Velveeta Cheese!!! It’s the best Mac n’ Cheese. What does that have to do with being white? (I sense that is a dumb question). Seriously. I’m clueless.
I don’t think the person using the search term regarding obstacles in a diverse church was necessarily seeing diversity as an obstacle. Perhaps s/he was thinking about how to initiate a discussion of a problem in his/her church in a culturally sensitive way, concerned that s/he might unintentionally offend someone.
I agree, Karla, I was just being snarky.
Mermade, when I was in college, there were many jokes about the tendency for white middle-class families to love processed foods: Wonder bread, velveeta, Lucky Charms, and so forth. And mayonnaise, of course.
Well, ya gotta face the facts, it’s true!
(As evident from how my white, middle class boyfriend wore an In-N-Out shirt and Pizza Hut cap at the same time when we went out to lunch). I thought, jeez, could you be anymore WHITE?!
I’m pretty darn white, and I’ve never had Velveeta. Then again, being an ovo-vegetarian, I’m guessing that Velveeta ain’t an option anymore.
I used to get some weird, wild hits back in the day, until I turned off google search on my blog. They always did crack me up, though. The things people search for!
Hee Hee.
But the chinchilla sex thing is just…creepy.
History_mom, it might be in a “how on earth do we tell what sex out new chinchilla is?” (at least, that’s my fervent hope)
Possible titles for your book, Hugo: Gender studies land a cat on a hot tin roof (WTF?), Why are women such bitches nowdays? (Buddy, you’re reason #1) and perhaps worst/best of all Chinchillas having sex.
(You are writing a book, riiiiiight?)
I still get tons of searches for “barely legal” and it takes them to this post:
http://pandagon.net/2006/02/13/barely-legal-xxxtian-girls/
And that makes me happy.
Maybe I’m not white ENOUGH, then, even though my whole background in European. Prosessed food makes me gag.
how to overcom obstacles in a diverse church (A. learn to spell. B. stop seeing diversity as an obstacle)
I would interpret that as overcoming obstacles to diversity in a church…
male chastity his frustration women correct him (I smell an MRA)
I smell a submissive looking for femdom.