Comments on: Age is never just a number: on “Juno” and covert older men/younger women boundary violation

By: Hung up on age and sex « The Apostate

Hung up on age and sex « The Apostate — Sun, 24 Aug 2008 06:26:51 +0000

[…] Hung up on age and sex Posted on August 23, 2008 by apostate This. […]

By: Sara

Sara — Sun, 25 May 2008 18:40:06 +0000

Also the scene in which she calls before going to Mark’s house, after letting her enter, Juno asks: “Is Vanessa home?” Right after, Mark replies: “No, we’re safe.”, and smiles.

That got me so confused! I didn’t know what he meant, I didn’t know what were his intentions. They were surely talking about watching horror movies and talking about music endlessly, and freely. But then again, knowing how he was reacting towards Juno, I just became very confused.

By: Jack

Jack — Wed, 14 May 2008 04:11:54 +0000

So… what does sexually active mean anyway? I’m afraid I didn’t see anything flirtatious about that scene, they didn’t act that way at all. To me the movie was about unconditional love, and it was portrayed here and throughout. Romantic love didn’t arise at all in this movie, Juno was even pregnant outside of any romantic relationship.

That belly and Juno’s discomfort was obvious, not quite as obvious as outside the elevator when we saw another bonding incident with Vanessa. I can only reflect on how a virile man feels holding his pregnant young wife. Assuming our character here is virile of course, it would be a very big decision to sacrifice having children, so how about giving this guy some thought? Men’s issues where also represented throughout the movie in regards to the biological father and the plot was about adoption as well as adolescent sex.

After all, isn’t it supposed to be every young heterosexual man’s dream to waltz like that and how society functions to create families? Juno was puzzled about this in a following scene with her father “why don’t people stay together?” she asked.

It is interesting though, the comments on this page and the cinema audience reaction. Where did this old man young girl thing come into this movie again? I look forward to the “Golden Age” when love and understanding will be looked at more a maturely.

By: Hugo Schwyzer

Hugo Schwyzer — Thu, 01 May 2008 17:12:31 +0000

Yay! Glad you liked it and that it resonated with you.

By: Erica

Erica — Thu, 01 May 2008 15:49:50 +0000

Thank you for this wonderful summation. I found myself fruitlessly trying to deal with this since I watched this movie last night. I couldn’t understand why this seemed so much like a sexual assault and why I felt so uncomfortable with the issue. I kept trying to figure out why the author would make this seem like some sort of violation would occur and even after it still seemed like a violation did occur. Now I understand. I think that this was an excellent movie and now I feel even more justified in thinking so after reading your analsis. Thanks again!

By: Lex

Lex — Sat, 01 Mar 2008 10:51:49 +0000

Thank you for all the comments guy. its really helped me sort a few things out in this film regarding this juno/batement stuff.

By: Karen

Karen — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 19:47:38 +0000

Thank you Hugo and I appreciate your writings on these subjects…I’d also like to say that with the passage of time too comes greater emotional investment and then one is faced with a most difficult dilemma. If one is tempted to leave due to the illusion of connection, they will leave behind a substantial investment and a huge chunk of themselves. To disengage with nothing to show for your time and energy but a broken spirit is hard to do. One may be tempted to delude themselves…Over the course of time; one may invest so much of themselves that it will be very difficult to realistically consider walking away. And if one does leave and admits that they’ve made a mistake for several years, one will likely feel ashamed. Shame and guilt are very big issues for some people and will make it even more difficult for them to leave.

By: Hugo Schwyzer

Hugo Schwyzer — Thu, 14 Feb 2008 17:42:39 +0000

Good point, Karen. One of the things that happens over and over again in age disparate relationships is that in the initial excitement, both partners have the illusion that the gap doesn’t matter, that their “connection” is so intense it transcends the chronological gulf. Invariably, with the passage of time and the gradual diminishing of that initial intensity, one or both becomes acutely aware of just how problematic the disparity is.

By: Karen

Karen — Thu, 14 Feb 2008 16:54:37 +0000

cathy says

“Yet, to everyone site: what is it about attraction that sometimes seems to obliterate concerns about age difference? Yet, again, what if two people connect to such a degree that they are only slightly aware that there is an age difference?”

In general during the beginning of all romantic relationships people focus on similarities rather than differences, because people are more fully present emotionally and focused on each other. It’s only later that issues start to emerge, so it would make sense then that age difference would not be focused on. I think many people are aware of differences, but choose to overlook them. It all comes back to the relationship that you have with yourself and what needs are being met.

By: sophonisba

sophonisba — Thu, 14 Feb 2008 04:11:12 +0000

Are you just exceptionally mature and find guys your own age immature?

There is nothing mature about “not relenting when he said no.” In fact, immaturity is the only possible excuse for that kind of behavior.

now tell me i need therapy

You’re probably fine. But “no means no” isn’t just for girls.